Jeans vs. Koolats
By beekay (Brandon Haught)
Do you know what koolats are? They are baggy pants that kind of look like a skirt. They are not very flattering, and they look, well, just down right
weird.
I know because my wife used to wear them. She didn't wear them by choice, but because of religious peer pressure. She was honestly afraid to wear jeans in public because some one from her church might see.
To live under such fear and pressure was horrible. My wife has always loved her jeans. But she had somehow fallen prey to the Independent Baptists.
Early in our marriage we lived in Oklahoma City. I was in the military and had to drag my family all over the place on the whims of the government. My wife was accepting of the lifestyle, but we were definitely not excited about the constant moving. It could really tear my wife up at times. Finding new friends and a place in the community to fit in was always painfully difficult for both of us.
So my wife went in search of a church where she could feel accepted and at home. She hit upon an Independent Baptist church. The place seemed all right. Neither my wife nor I knew anything about the church's doctrine. It was a Baptist church and they preached from the King James version of the bible. That's all that mattered at the time.
But then during a casual conversation in the church one day, my wife commented on how she practically lived in jeans. The respectable ladies of the church immediately gave her some very cold stares and later pulled her aside to educate her about how a proper bible-believing, Jesus-loving woman should dress. If she is not in a conservative dress or skirt, then she should be in koolats. Jeans were just not lady-like or Christian. My wife promptly went out and bought a few pairs of koolats for wearing in public.
Around this time I had stopped attending church on a regular basis. I had just had enough. I had been apathetic towards religion for most of my life until I got married. Then I gave religion a try for a while out of respect for my wife. But the whole deal just seemed ridiculous to me, so I shifted into an agnostic frame of mind.
It didn't take long for the pastor to pay me a visit and try to convert me. I am proud to say, that despite my mixed up feelings about religion at the time, I resisted the bible thumping. I have to admit that it was hard because I couldn't answer many of the man's questions with any amount of certainty. On the other hand, the only thing he could offer me was the bible, and I had serious doubts about that book.
Meanwhile, my wife sank a bit more into the Independent Baptist way of life. It all seemed so strange to me, but I didn't try to rescue her because I had nothing to say to her that had any force. How could a wishy-washy agnostic summon up an argument to dissuade an Independent Baptist? Fortunately, I didn't have to. My wife's stubborn independence eventually shone through.
The women's role in Independent Baptist life is that of subservience to the man. An excellent example of such thinking can be found at www.sounddoctrine.com. Read the following quote from the site and I'm sure you will be truly awed by the deep thoughts presented:
Over time this way of thinking became more and more evident. We found out that at this church it was believed that men and women should not swim together. At a church picnic, the men went through line first to get their food, then the male children, then the women. Yup, the women were last! There was no real 'family togetherness' at the picnic. It was crystal clear that women were of lesser value.
That's what snapped it for my wife. She just couldn't hang with the idea of women being so obviously inferior. Soon afterwards, she went shopping for a new church. She avoided any church that had 'Independent' in the name like the plague from then on. I deeply love my wife and even though her stubborn streak annoys me -- as I am sure my lazy procrastination annoys her -- that stubbornness had set her free on more than one occasion.
I'm not sure whatever happened to her koolats. I just know that now she won't be caught dead in a pair of them!
By beekay (Brandon Haught)
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I know because my wife used to wear them. She didn't wear them by choice, but because of religious peer pressure. She was honestly afraid to wear jeans in public because some one from her church might see.
To live under such fear and pressure was horrible. My wife has always loved her jeans. But she had somehow fallen prey to the Independent Baptists.
Early in our marriage we lived in Oklahoma City. I was in the military and had to drag my family all over the place on the whims of the government. My wife was accepting of the lifestyle, but we were definitely not excited about the constant moving. It could really tear my wife up at times. Finding new friends and a place in the community to fit in was always painfully difficult for both of us.
So my wife went in search of a church where she could feel accepted and at home. She hit upon an Independent Baptist church. The place seemed all right. Neither my wife nor I knew anything about the church's doctrine. It was a Baptist church and they preached from the King James version of the bible. That's all that mattered at the time.
But then during a casual conversation in the church one day, my wife commented on how she practically lived in jeans. The respectable ladies of the church immediately gave her some very cold stares and later pulled her aside to educate her about how a proper bible-believing, Jesus-loving woman should dress. If she is not in a conservative dress or skirt, then she should be in koolats. Jeans were just not lady-like or Christian. My wife promptly went out and bought a few pairs of koolats for wearing in public.
Around this time I had stopped attending church on a regular basis. I had just had enough. I had been apathetic towards religion for most of my life until I got married. Then I gave religion a try for a while out of respect for my wife. But the whole deal just seemed ridiculous to me, so I shifted into an agnostic frame of mind.
It didn't take long for the pastor to pay me a visit and try to convert me. I am proud to say, that despite my mixed up feelings about religion at the time, I resisted the bible thumping. I have to admit that it was hard because I couldn't answer many of the man's questions with any amount of certainty. On the other hand, the only thing he could offer me was the bible, and I had serious doubts about that book.
Meanwhile, my wife sank a bit more into the Independent Baptist way of life. It all seemed so strange to me, but I didn't try to rescue her because I had nothing to say to her that had any force. How could a wishy-washy agnostic summon up an argument to dissuade an Independent Baptist? Fortunately, I didn't have to. My wife's stubborn independence eventually shone through.
The women's role in Independent Baptist life is that of subservience to the man. An excellent example of such thinking can be found at www.sounddoctrine.com. Read the following quote from the site and I'm sure you will be truly awed by the deep thoughts presented:
"A woman is different from a man! A woman is different in her body, in her interests, in her thinking, in her abilities: not inferior-- different. A woman can choose nearly any occupation she likes. But I deny that she will find fulfillment that will surpass that which a godly Christian woman finds who, secure in the knowledge of her womanhood and its rightness, builds a home for her husband and children! Her confidence in her ability to be a help, meet for her husband's needs comes as she finds her place in the order of authority. WOMAN'S NATURE REQUIRES OBEDIENCE
"I Timothy 2:12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over a man,. Eve's sin was because she was deceived. Adam's was not. He knew the consequences of eating the forbidden fruit. She did not. Women are more often led into spiritual error than men. It might be because of her emotions. But, she doesn't have to be led in error. That is the reason God commanded her not to usurp authority over the man, so she can be protected from false doctrine. Submission to our husbands gives us an umbrella of protection."
Over time this way of thinking became more and more evident. We found out that at this church it was believed that men and women should not swim together. At a church picnic, the men went through line first to get their food, then the male children, then the women. Yup, the women were last! There was no real 'family togetherness' at the picnic. It was crystal clear that women were of lesser value.
That's what snapped it for my wife. She just couldn't hang with the idea of women being so obviously inferior. Soon afterwards, she went shopping for a new church. She avoided any church that had 'Independent' in the name like the plague from then on. I deeply love my wife and even though her stubborn streak annoys me -- as I am sure my lazy procrastination annoys her -- that stubbornness had set her free on more than one occasion.
I'm not sure whatever happened to her koolats. I just know that now she won't be caught dead in a pair of them!
April 20, 2002